Turning 30 in the Land of Tuba
I'd like to do something special for my 30th birthday in May. Lately, I've been thinking of doing something illegal, even.
I'd like to travel to a country that rhymes with "Tuba". Since I'm positive that Big Brother reads Blogs -- especially mine -- I will not refer to this intriguing, forbidden place by name.
I have some ideas on how to accomplish this goal. And, if I end up getting busted, ya'll will help out with the bail, right? I can even put up a nifty PayPal button and everything.
If Project Tuba doesn't work out, I still want to do something out of my comfort zone for my 30th. Something that's always been on my "someday" list. Because as Marla says, Someday is Now.
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Some random observations:
I've come to the conclusion that my entire office is cleverly constructed out of cake and cookies, like some marvelous Willie Wonka fantasy. If I took a bite out of the corner of my desk: cake. If I licked my stapler: tootsie roll. If I munched on my post-it notes: sugar cookies.
Why don't they market chew toys for adults? I've realized that I have a strong oral compulsion to have something chewy in my mouth at all times. My personal adult chew toy would be pink, squeaky and cookie-flavored. When particularly excited, I might even flail my head back and forth, grrrrrring happily. If I had a tail, I'd wag it.
These are the most inspired lyrics ever: Food Glorious Food.
7 Comments:
Ha! I'd buy a chew toy for human adults! I'd want mine to be mint chocolate chip flavored. I could see everyone sitting at their desks, happily gnawing away.
I just found your site through Durtee Martini. Very cool. I have to go read more of it now.
I think you have your million dollar idea there with the human chew toys. Yes indeedy! And man, I want you to turn 30 in Tuba, because I want to live vicariously through you! Please?!
i'm kind of slow today so i don't get the tuba reference but i bet i will get it if i just keep thinking hard enough :-)
my chew toy is gum but its not that satisfying after a while. i wish they had gum that tasted like real bubble gum, and lasted all day. mmmmm.
Dude - it is like totally LEGAL to go to Aruba, so don't you worry (wink).
I adore the human chew toy idea. I think I want mine to be a rope with a tennis ball on it. Also, I think I'm a fetcher, so something bouncy would be nice.
Thanks for visiting my site. Can't wait to check yours out too...
There are legal ways to go to Tuba...they're like "cultural exchange" tours or some such stuff.
I'm so jealous! I can't wait to go to Tuba!! :)
My friend went to Tuba with a cultural exchange group and had the time of her life. May could be tricky - I seem to recall that there were only so many of these visitor visas allowed, and there may have been a waiting list...? I could get more info if you're interested. If not, you could float over and use the wet foot/dry foot policy to stake out a spot on the beach!
Saw your page while searching for "human chew toy".. lol. I would definitely buy one, if they were hard enough for me. Sounds like great jaw exercise, perhaps have them in steps to build your jaw muscles? In fact, I'm chewing a really hard piece of plastic right now, and getting the best of it! Oy!
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