My Pride Takes a Blow

Last week one of my office mates was giving me a hard time, so I mockingly punched him in the shoulder. He said, "Man, you're weak!" So I punched him again, harder, and he still failed to be impressed.

Outraged at being termed weak, I got the idea that I should arm wrestle one of the other women in the office to prove my strength. So she and I sat down at my desk, took our respective arm-wrestling positions, and commenced.

She beat me! Easily, in a few seconds, with barely a grimace and she hardly exercises and certainly doesn't lift weights. I was aghast!

I went around to the other women in the office hoping to entice someone else to wrestle, to give me a new chance to prove my mettle, but sadly found no takers.

Being whupped in arm-wrestling sucked. I told her we had to have a re-match in a few months. I fully intend to defeat her and claim a triumphant victory. I will then force my co-workers to carry me around the office parking lot on their shoulders singing my praises.
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Inspired by Chris' amazing focus and goal setting, I've decided to draft a four-week workout schedule for February. The schedule incorporates running, weights, HIIT, various other cardio and a week of "taper", in which I will back off some on the cardio to allow my body to make some adjustments. I read about that idea in "Slow Fat Triathlete" and it makes sense to me. This is also the month in which I plan to join a running club and run a second 5k.

I think February is a crucial month to try this schedule because I dread February. In my neck of the woods, February is always chilly, drizzly and just generally gloomy. My motivation to get out into the world and work out as opposed to staying inside is going to be challenged this month, so I figured I needed a plan of attack.
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Saturday I ran from my house to the downtown library. My city is rather famed for having a river running through the town center, and there is a sub-street level portion of it that runs throughout the city, lined with restaurants. It's a colorful, picturesque place, but geared towards tourists. I rarely visit, but have found myself for several Saturday's running downtown in the early morning and running along the river.

This Saturday, I didn't eat breakfast before the run, which was a mistake. By the time I was done with my regular 35 minutes, I was nauseous and drained of energy. I lay down on a stone ledge by the river for several minutes to recover.

There was a tree above me, and as I lay there I watched the early morning sun reflect off the water and create undulating ribbons of light against the tree's leaves. At that moment I felt a warm sense of ownership for my city, for this place.

I don't think I felt that same sense of recognition, of belonging before I started running and biking regularly (and, or course, using public transportation regularly.) Doing all these things forces you out into the physical world, into the neighborhood, onto the streets. Buildings, intersections, vistas begin to have a personal meaning. You build up a history with these spots after repeated visiting. I once read about the idea of drawing a "heart" map: sitting down and mapping certain spots that are part of your emotional topography-- the place you do your laundry early on Sundays, the place you fell off your bike one time, or fed a sweet stray dog, or the spot with the beautiful front porch you covet. With the ways running and biking puts you out into the landscape, it would be easy for me to sit down and ink such a heart map.

My run Saturday was awful, but the feeling of belonging in this world that I got afterward was good. And it was the run -- the accumulations of runs, actually -- that brought me that sense of awareness and gratitude and affection.